Are You Doing the Right Thing By Becoming a Parent After 40?

Whatever your reason for contemplating having kids at this time in life is, it’s a huge decision. A huge financial, emotional, physical and mental decision. You’re looking at an undoable lifetime commitment that will define everything about your future from this point on. From the second they are born (and somewhat before) it will cost you money, sleep, play time and a bit of your sanity. They will test your relationship and interfere with everything you plan and/or do day and night. Sound daunting? Just wait until you’re expected to volunteer for the school bake sale, and have to trade in that European vacation for a birthday party overrun by screaming two-year-olds. The days of kicking back with a nice glass of wine and turning on your favorite Netflix guilty pleasure after work are about to be a thing of the past (at least until you can get yourself into an “adult community” once the kids graduate high school). If you’re still reading, congratulations. You get it. You get the unequivocable fulfillment of not only the difficulties, but the fun of giggling and snuggling babies, the silliness and magic of toddlers, the sincerity and potential of adolescents and the overwhelming commitment of raising kind, competent, confident, healthy teens who are about to be released into society. You get that there is absolutely nothing more worthwhile than being a parent. A good, kind, committed parent. One who understands that having kids is not a selfish act of keeping the genetics going, but a selfless act of caring for unique little individuals who deserve the best life possible in order to become who they are destined to become (not what you think they are destined to become), and in return will love you like you’ve never been loved. You get that you will have lower lows and higher highs than you’ve ever had, depending entirely on how your babies at every age are fairing. You get that children are an honor and a privilege, not a right, and that all you do for them won’t be sacrifices, they will be choices. You get that there is undoubtedly nothing you could possibly do with the rest of your life that will matter more than the time very well spent raising your child/children. Congratulations.